Creating a Marriage Anchored in Faith; Divorce Proofing Your Marriage Part 5 of 10

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[00:01:25] But how good is it going to feel knowing that they're living their best life and they're enjoying their family the way that you enjoyed your family?

[00:01:39] So whatever you're experiencing right now, that's what your kids are going to experience.

[00:01:45] And if you don't like what you're living right now, change it. Change it right now.

[00:01:49] It's never too late to change.

[00:01:57] Uh, no.

[00:01:59] Ooh, that's better, right babe?

[00:02:03] Yeah!

[00:02:05] Yeah.

[00:02:08] She founded an architectural concrete company.

[00:02:11] He founded a $100 million clothing company.

[00:02:14] She took the world by storm as a social media star.

[00:02:17] He took the world by storm as a famous serial entrepreneur.

[00:02:21] Together we started a business.

[00:02:22] And had babies.

[00:02:24] Now we're figuring out the best ways to do both.

[00:02:26] Join us as we learn from other entrepreneurs going through the same life struggles.

[00:02:31] As they share their life hacks about success, love, kids.

[00:02:35] And everything in between.

[00:02:36] Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.

[00:02:43] Ephesians 5.25

[00:02:45] Marriage is a gift from God to us.

[00:02:49] Quality.

[00:02:50] Your marriage is the gift to Him.

[00:02:55] Welcome to the Pretty and Punk Podcast.

[00:02:57] My name is Dan Caldwell and I'm here with my beautiful co-host and sexy wife.

[00:03:06] Can you say that?

[00:03:08] I'm trying new things.

[00:03:09] I'm trying new things.

[00:03:11] Okay.

[00:03:12] Ildico Ferenzi.

[00:03:14] We've got another great podcast for you.

[00:03:18] And it's part five of our divorce proofing your marriage series.

[00:03:26] And it's about a marriage anchored in faith and how important that is.

[00:03:31] And we, it's something that we practice and believe in and something that we find very important to our marriage.

[00:03:37] And the truth is we probably wouldn't have a marriage if it was, if we didn't have it.

[00:03:42] I think so.

[00:03:43] We went through some really hard times and not the, the us praying together is what I believe what made the difference.

[00:03:51] For sure.

[00:03:52] Absolutely.

[00:03:53] A hundred percent.

[00:03:54] I told you that.

[00:03:56] Now you believe it too.

[00:03:57] And now I'm telling you that.

[00:04:00] And you better believe it.

[00:04:01] And you better believe it.

[00:04:02] But before we get into that.

[00:04:04] Hey guys, we hope you're enjoying today's episode of the Pretty and Punk podcast.

[00:04:09] And if you are, and you haven't already hit that liked and subscribe button, it just takes a second.

[00:04:14] It means so much to us because it really helps the podcast get out there to more listeners like you guys.

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[00:04:23] We really appreciate that too.

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[00:04:27] Even the babies look forward to them every day.

[00:04:30] If you share this episode on social media today, don't forget to tag us.

[00:04:35] We want to celebrate you because we know it's not easy being a parent in business.

[00:04:40] And the way that you juggle things makes you a superhero.

[00:04:43] That's worth a shout out.

[00:04:44] Together, we have a community of our personal followers as well.

[00:04:48] And we just want to put it out there.

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[00:04:56] And we're so proud and grateful to have you a part of this family.

[00:05:02] So don't forget the sh- all the links are below in the show notes.

[00:05:07] And thank you again.

[00:05:09] And let's get back to the show.

[00:05:10] The most important thing is realizing that your marriage comes first before all else.

[00:05:19] It has to.

[00:05:20] It has to.

[00:05:21] Because if it doesn't, how are your kids going to see how to build a solid foundation?

[00:05:28] How are they going to learn to build one themselves?

[00:05:31] This is a very important question to ask yourselves.

[00:05:36] And to, are you, just to identify, how are you living your marriage?

[00:05:43] How are you presenting your marriage?

[00:05:45] Because those little ones are watching every single thing you do like a hawk.

[00:05:52] And either they're picking up toxic traits or they're picking up traits to live their very best life with their family.

[00:05:59] Because, yes, the amazing part is we get, if we're smart and we understand the value of a beautiful family, you get to hold on to the precious gifts of having your children be young and spending that time.

[00:06:18] This is the gift.

[00:06:19] This is the blessing.

[00:06:19] This is the blessing.

[00:06:20] But once they are adults, they're going to go out and live their own lives.

[00:06:26] And then now, now it's just you and your husband.

[00:06:29] But how good is it going to feel knowing that they're living their best life and they're enjoying their family the way that you enjoyed your family?

[00:06:43] So whatever you're experiencing right now, that's what your kids are going to experience.

[00:06:49] And if you don't like what you're living right now, change it.

[00:06:52] Change it right now.

[00:06:53] It's never too late to change.

[00:06:57] Right.

[00:06:57] I think that, and I know what you meant by that, but I'll say on top of that, I think that it's important because I know you mentioned you need your marriage to be first place.

[00:07:11] And that's true, but I'll just, I'll just come up with that.

[00:07:14] No, above that, obviously there's three people.

[00:07:18] What this podcast is about.

[00:07:18] Right.

[00:07:19] There's three people.

[00:07:20] I mean, there's three.

[00:07:23] The most important, obviously, is God and living a faith.

[00:07:27] Keeping God first place in your marriage.

[00:07:29] Keeping God first place.

[00:07:30] Especially in your marriage.

[00:07:31] Yes.

[00:07:31] And it's true to what you said, even in that, when we speak about religion, when we speak

[00:07:37] about your faith in God, when you keep God first place in your marriage, your kids will see that.

[00:07:43] Your kids will see how important God is to you.

[00:07:46] And I know for a fact that that most likely will translate to you, to your kids down the road when they have their own families.

[00:07:56] 100%.

[00:07:56] Because I know what happened to me.

[00:07:57] I grew up in a family, we didn't have a lot of money, we didn't have nice cars, we didn't have that stuff.

[00:08:05] But the one thing we always had was a close family.

[00:08:09] Unfortunately, my parents were married for 55 years.

[00:08:12] Mm-hmm.

[00:08:12] They brought us to church every Sunday.

[00:08:18] And they kept God first place in our household.

[00:08:22] And I know that is what always sparked, because I fell away a little bit.

[00:08:29] Not that I didn't denounce God or anything like that.

[00:08:33] I just wasn't close and I wasn't living that way.

[00:08:36] Yeah.

[00:08:36] I wasn't living with God first place.

[00:08:38] Well, when we met each other, I didn't think you were religious.

[00:08:42] Because every Sunday...

[00:08:43] Well, because yeah, I wasn't living like that.

[00:08:44] Right.

[00:08:45] Every Sunday, I was at church and I would call you because we had a long distance relationship

[00:08:49] and you're off gallivanting it here and there.

[00:08:53] I wasn't going to church.

[00:08:55] I'm at church.

[00:08:56] But it's funny.

[00:08:57] Here's the thing.

[00:08:58] It doesn't...

[00:08:59] I mean, it does matter.

[00:09:01] It really does matter because it's hard.

[00:09:03] It's hard to get back on that track.

[00:09:05] But I feel like if you have those roots there as a child, and I had them for sure.

[00:09:14] Absolutely.

[00:09:16] And it's not always a happy marriage.

[00:09:21] You know, my mom was a single mom, but she had an incredible marriage for many years.

[00:09:27] But sadly, when I think...

[00:09:31] I don't know if it was ego.

[00:09:33] I don't know if it was the money.

[00:09:35] I don't know what exactly happened.

[00:09:38] But the devil stepped in.

[00:09:40] The enemy stepped in and it tore the marriage apart.

[00:09:43] And that's what it does.

[00:09:45] If it can't tear you apart with unfaithfulness or fighting, it'll pull you apart with illness.

[00:09:55] Whatever it can do, it will try to tear you apart.

[00:09:58] Let's just be honest.

[00:09:59] So your spiritual, your prayer life, your faith life needs to be strong every single day.

[00:10:09] And I know a lot of times we've experienced it, and I don't want to throw us under the

[00:10:15] bus, but these times when you've been away and you've been really busy and we haven't

[00:10:21] been able to pray together or you haven't been able to, you know, be a part of the prayer life,

[00:10:29] I feel things came up.

[00:10:32] We started fighting.

[00:10:34] Things started happening.

[00:10:36] And it really tricks your brain into thinking you may even be headed towards divorce or things

[00:10:44] just aren't working.

[00:10:46] But then you have to...

[00:10:48] Things were really stressful at that time.

[00:10:49] Things were stressful.

[00:10:50] And did I just get thrown under the bus?

[00:10:52] Did I just get thrown?

[00:10:53] Well, I mean...

[00:10:54] I feel like I got thrown.

[00:10:55] It doesn't matter because I understand that a lot of people, I mean, we know life gets

[00:11:00] busy, things happen, right?

[00:11:02] The enemy steps in with tragedies or sadness or illness or, or parents getting sick or businesses

[00:11:10] going bankrupt or whatever it is just to take your eye off of the marriage.

[00:11:15] So that dispute or disputes, you know, just arguments can start sparking and then they get bigger

[00:11:23] and bigger.

[00:11:24] And then you wonder where did this even come from?

[00:11:28] We were so strong.

[00:11:29] What just happened?

[00:11:31] Like two weeks ago, we're at a, you know, everything was great.

[00:11:34] Right, right.

[00:11:35] And that's the enemy.

[00:11:36] And that is why you need to be very vigilant and you need to be strong on your prayer life

[00:11:43] together.

[00:11:44] And even when things aren't great because they weren't great for a minute, let's be honest.

[00:11:51] And it's not just us.

[00:11:53] It's other people out there that are going through this, other couples.

[00:11:56] Surround yourself with people.

[00:11:59] Cause I know I do, because it would have been very easy to talk to people that are, that

[00:12:05] are going to encourage me to, I don't know.

[00:12:10] See, there's something wrong with him.

[00:12:13] He's, he's wrong and he's this and he's that.

[00:12:16] It would be very easy for me to turn to those type of people where rather I'm able to turn

[00:12:23] into people that are like advising us or me, me in a way that is for our greater good.

[00:12:35] You guys need to pray together.

[00:12:36] I will be praying for you guys because you guys are going to come through and just speaking

[00:12:42] speaking positively over your marriage, speaking positively over your spouse, even though they

[00:12:49] quite, they, they may be in the, in the wrong.

[00:12:53] They may be a little more aggressive or using language that they don't usually use.

[00:12:59] And you're more sensitive and you're alone with the kids and everything's, you know, at

[00:13:05] this, this peak sensitivity and it could go down a very bad hill.

[00:13:12] So also watch who you surround yourself with and get back on that prayer life.

[00:13:18] Yeah.

[00:13:18] I mean, going to church, I think is, is one of the things that I think is really important

[00:13:23] for us and what keeps us grounded in our marriage.

[00:13:27] And when you're listening, you know, when you, when you're at church and you're listening

[00:13:32] to, they're always speaking about strong marriages.

[00:13:35] They're always speaking about, uh, being close together and praying together.

[00:13:40] And, and so I think you have this like, um, I don't know.

[00:13:44] Confirmation.

[00:13:45] Yeah.

[00:13:45] It's like a way it's like brings you your, you're hearing the same things together and

[00:13:51] you're, it's bringing you closer together as you're listening and.

[00:13:55] And testimonies.

[00:13:57] I love testimonies from other couples.

[00:13:59] Yeah.

[00:13:59] When you hear these other couples that have gone through stuff and you know, you're not alone.

[00:14:03] You're that, you know, maybe you had a bad week and, and you're dealing with something.

[00:14:09] When you hear these other couples that are going through stuff and you hear how they

[00:14:13] brought their marriage closer together through prayer.

[00:14:16] And of course we pray every morning and every night and, uh, and of course over our meals.

[00:14:22] And, and, and we just try to, no matter where we are, we're not afraid to pray at a restaurant.

[00:14:28] We, we just keep it centered in our lives because we weren't always this way and we did have problems.

[00:14:35] And now I think because we keep God first place, because we keep our marriage, um, first place.

[00:14:44] And a community that keeps us accountable.

[00:14:45] Because we go to church every single Sunday.

[00:14:47] And we keep them accountable.

[00:14:49] And, and guys, even if someone is struggling through something, maybe an illness or they just, they can't get to church.

[00:14:56] You can still get to church.

[00:14:57] It's online.

[00:14:58] You can get to church and you can worship right from, from your home.

[00:15:03] Obviously it's the best to go to church in person.

[00:15:07] And yes, absolutely.

[00:15:08] But sometimes if your immune system or whatever you guys are going through, I know a lot, there's a lot of people in our community dealing with different, different situations.

[00:15:17] But don't let that ever, ever, ever let you miss a Sunday or, or if you need something extra, there's tons, tons of stuff available through the week too.

[00:15:29] And, and here's the thing that, and you know this, that there's a lot of people who say they're religious and they may even go to church, but they, to me, there's a, there's levels.

[00:15:44] Oh yeah.

[00:15:44] There's levels.

[00:15:45] And we were at a place, um, or at least I, I, I could say I was at a place years ago.

[00:15:52] I would call myself religious in the way that, yes, I would, I had no problem praying before a meal or, uh, saying nighttime prayers with my kids.

[00:16:02] But I think I was like checking the box.

[00:16:06] I wasn't, I wasn't feeling it in my heart.

[00:16:09] And now, I mean, I, now I think it's so important when you have God in your life and you keep him first place, you're, you have conversations with him.

[00:16:20] Yeah.

[00:16:20] When things aren't going like you want them to go.

[00:16:24] Right.

[00:16:24] When you have, when you feel like you can be, I asked God to help me be a better husband.

[00:16:30] I have, I asked God to help me be a better father.

[00:16:33] Yeah.

[00:16:34] To be a better person when, you know, I'm not, when I maybe have said something to the kids or I'm not, maybe I, I was, I was a little short or whatever the situation might be.

[00:16:46] Yeah.

[00:16:47] I'm constantly asking for guidance and, and to be better, to be a better person.

[00:16:52] Me too.

[00:16:53] Yeah.

[00:16:53] And I think when, when you're religious, like really religious, when you actually keep God first place.

[00:17:00] Coming in.

[00:17:02] You, you have that open communication and it just keeps you closer to God and it keeps your marriage so much better because.

[00:17:08] Right.

[00:17:09] I love those.

[00:17:10] I love those prayers because I find myself like, like it's just so much, there's been several months and I was, you know, just me, me with the kids.

[00:17:20] And I, I found myself, I think before the holidays, I feel a little high.

[00:17:29] What is it?

[00:17:29] Over stimulated and I catch myself.

[00:17:32] But at the same time, this is a good lesson, not just for myself, but it's a great lesson for my kids because I love those prayers.

[00:17:40] I pray, I pray with the children when, when, you know, when you're working, but usually we pray together every night, but, um, I love the prayers where we do our prayers, but then I also, um, humble myself and just ask God to forgive me for whatever it is that I've done through the days, through the day.

[00:18:05] That, I mean, it's not major, major, but I, I asking him to come into me and just lead me to be a better mother, to help me deal with the situation that I don't feel like I dealt with it the way that Jesus would have dealt with it.

[00:18:24] And these are the conversations that I have with God in front of the children.

[00:18:27] And I love having those conversations with, with God in front of the children because they're learning, they're understanding that I noticed that it wasn't quite right.

[00:18:40] And I apologize to them and I explain to them and I don't make any excuses because I tell them right off the bat, I could have dealt with it better.

[00:18:49] And I'm asking God to lead me in, in a, in a, just, just really burn in my soul to help me deal with certain situations in a better way.

[00:19:04] I think that's so important to, to open.

[00:19:08] I feel like, I feel like there's a lot of parents out there that rather than explain things, my mom was so good explaining things.

[00:19:17] She would never say because I said so you do it because I said, and it was never that there was always an explanation and intelligent conversation.

[00:19:26] And I really try to have those all the time.

[00:19:29] And sometimes I still feel like I could have done better.

[00:19:33] Yeah.

[00:19:34] Because that's how you, that's how you guide your children.

[00:19:37] That's how you pour, pour into them.

[00:19:38] Yeah.

[00:19:38] I think Daniel's so he, he's, he's so articulate because we always do that with him.

[00:19:45] You have to, I feel you have to.

[00:19:47] You know, you have to.

[00:19:48] You know what else?

[00:19:49] Um, when we pray, I feel like it softens my heart to situation.

[00:19:55] So for not like, sometimes I don't always agree.

[00:19:58] I don't always agree, you know, but.

[00:20:00] You don't have to, but I don't think so.

[00:20:03] But I leave it alone.

[00:20:04] But you have to understand.

[00:20:05] But I leave it alone.

[00:20:06] Right.

[00:20:07] Because I'm like, you know what?

[00:20:08] Is it.

[00:20:09] There's a reason for everything.

[00:20:11] How important is it that I need to stand on this rock right now?

[00:20:13] Right.

[00:20:13] Right.

[00:20:13] And, and sometimes you can go, okay, let me, let me put myself in your shoes for a second.

[00:20:19] And understand why you're coming from.

[00:20:22] Yeah.

[00:20:23] Coming from that position.

[00:20:25] I learned that.

[00:20:25] At a young age.

[00:20:26] And I think.

[00:20:27] It's important.

[00:20:27] And I only get that when I'm close to God.

[00:20:31] And, and having a conversation where you look at it and you're like, they're coming at me or they're attacking me.

[00:20:42] And I, and I know that this is like, they say, it's, it's a, it's something that you pick up when you're a kid.

[00:20:49] And I, I swear I'm not attacking you.

[00:20:53] This is what's going on inside of me and inside of my mind when I'm, I love you more than anything.

[00:21:00] That's why I married you.

[00:21:02] But I don't know where that thought is coming from.

[00:21:05] And if we can just talk through that rather than you getting mad and walking away and just leaving it.

[00:21:12] And then me feeling hurt and you feeling angry.

[00:21:16] Cause I always feel like I get hurt, you get angry.

[00:21:19] And then if we leave it at that, that's going to create resentment.

[00:21:23] And that's in our notes too, is be careful, learn how to communicate so well.

[00:21:29] And, you know, pray, pray for that guidance.

[00:21:31] Because if you can communicate well, there will not be resentment because resentment is another thing that leads to divorce.

[00:21:39] Many years of resentment, there will be no attraction, no physical touch.

[00:21:46] It just leads down this ugly road.

[00:21:49] So you definitely want to attack that before it attacks your marriage.

[00:21:55] And it's a sort of confession too.

[00:21:56] When you, when you're able to say in the prayer, um, you know, in front of your spouse, you know, help me be a better husband.

[00:22:03] It's a, it's, it's kind of a, an all encompassing confession that, you know, whatever just happened.

[00:22:09] And I want to be better.

[00:22:10] Yeah, of course.

[00:22:11] And when you show that you want to be better to your spouse, you're trying to be better that, you know, there's some sense of forgiveness there too.

[00:22:18] Right.

[00:22:18] I love what, um, uh, uh, Denzel Washington, uh, says about his marriage.

[00:22:24] He said, uh, something about that prayer is, uh, is the center, that God and prayer is the center of his marriage.

[00:22:35] And it's the reason why they were, were able to, I mean, imagine being in Hollywood.

[00:22:39] It's not easy.

[00:22:40] And the reason why, why their marriage, uh, I think his wife's name is Pauletta or something like that is, is the reason why their marriage is so strong and why they were able to last this long.

[00:22:51] See, I believe that a hundred percent.

[00:22:54] And I believe, I mean, I'm sure if you were where we are in any other relationship, it would have lasted.

[00:23:04] If I am where we are in any other relationship, like I can now spot it in couples that we work with and I could spot it.

[00:23:14] I could spot exactly all the problems that led to the failure of my past relationship.

[00:23:21] And it is so fricking sad because, um, people can prevent these things.

[00:23:28] You could have prevented it.

[00:23:29] I could have prevented it.

[00:23:31] But I mean, this isn't, that wasn't God's, um, I feel like you and I were meant to come together.

[00:23:39] I'm just saying that.

[00:23:41] It all happened the way it was supposed to.

[00:23:43] It all happened the way.

[00:23:44] And it's a lesson.

[00:23:44] People need to fight for their marriages and they need to pray for their marriages.

[00:23:49] And they're not.

[00:23:50] If it's not abusive physically.

[00:23:53] And sometimes you could also, you know, I feel like there was a time when you would say things that were hurt, hurtful.

[00:24:02] Because again, you're the angry one.

[00:24:04] I'm the hurt one.

[00:24:05] And the net, like, I just want to talk about, I want to fix this.

[00:24:08] But that's, that's usually how it is.

[00:24:10] The women are the sensitive ones and the guys get angry.

[00:24:13] And then it just goes down that, that.

[00:24:15] And I feel like it's almost every relationship, right?

[00:24:19] Mm-hmm.

[00:24:20] Right?

[00:24:21] Exactly.

[00:24:21] And there's, there's a couple studies out of, there's a study out of Michigan that talks about families or, or a husband and wife, a spouse, um, and two spouses, uh, coming together.

[00:24:34] Under, under one flag, under, under God.

[00:24:37] Yeah.

[00:24:37] To, to be close, not so much just to be closer together, but the fact that they're both praising God together.

[00:24:44] Yeah.

[00:24:45] Makes a stronger relationship.

[00:24:47] And I think as, didn't you, don't remember reading a statistic about, um, divorce and that they say, you know, 50% of all marriages end in divorce.

[00:24:55] But I think it was 1% of marriages, of, of 1% of marriages that pray together end in divorce.

[00:25:04] So, I mean, that's the, that's like night and day.

[00:25:07] The fact that it goes down, uh, you know, 49%.

[00:25:12] Yes.

[00:25:13] As far as divorce, as the divorce rate.

[00:25:16] I believe that.

[00:25:16] That's crazy.

[00:25:17] I believe that.

[00:25:18] It's crazy.

[00:25:19] And I believe it too.

[00:25:19] I think that's my point.

[00:25:20] I see the night and day in our relationship when we started going to church and started praying together.

[00:25:27] And it's not even close.

[00:25:29] It's not even close.

[00:25:31] Right.

[00:25:32] It just makes for, I, I see that it's almost an antidote.

[00:25:36] Like you want to go to people and go to people that are having problems in their marriage and go, just stop and pray together.

[00:25:43] I know.

[00:25:43] Are you going to church every Sunday?

[00:25:46] Yeah.

[00:25:46] Are you really going to church?

[00:25:47] Are you sitting in church thinking about the things you got to do when you get out of here?

[00:25:52] Are you really going to church?

[00:25:54] Are you letting it touch your soul?

[00:25:56] Yes.

[00:25:57] Are you, are you really praying?

[00:25:59] Are you praying with your spouse in a way that you're really reaching out to God and asking him to help you in your marriage?

[00:26:06] Because if you're not, I understand why your marriage is, is going down the hole right now.

[00:26:12] Yeah.

[00:26:12] And I promise you, if you reach deeper and you go to that level that your marriage will, will be better and better for it.

[00:26:23] Right.

[00:26:23] And I mean, that's the most important thing.

[00:26:25] Marriage is the pinnacle of importance above everything.

[00:26:28] And I liked what you were, I know you were going down the path of just drawing the line in the sand, getting rid of the people that don't have the same beliefs, getting rid of the things.

[00:26:42] I feel like you and I are totally different people.

[00:26:46] We don't, I mean, for me, when I become a mother, nursing was really, really important to me to make sure that my kids are getting every single ounce of nutrition that they need.

[00:27:01] And then I found that I was just getting healthier and healthier.

[00:27:05] Not that we drank a lot or we were drinkers, but I, it's been years and years and years and years since I've had a drink.

[00:27:14] But now I'm understanding that I've renewed as a, like, I can't even compare myself to who I was, to who I am today.

[00:27:25] And if you want to pursue everything in the highest, you need to give up everything in the lowest.

[00:27:33] And you know what that means to you.

[00:27:35] So if you want to pursue everything in the highest, you need to give up everything in the lowest and it's going to change your life.

[00:27:42] And you know what I'm talking about.

[00:27:44] All the things, all the things, because you can't be half in, you have to commit.

[00:27:50] And once you commit, you won't even miss those things.

[00:27:54] You won't.

[00:27:54] I promise.

[00:27:56] I'm living my best life.

[00:27:58] What do you, what do you think happens or what do you do when, and because our relationship was a little bit weird in the fact that we come from different religious backgrounds.

[00:28:07] Well, I mean, not weird, but weird in the way that we come from different religious backgrounds, even though we kind of meet in the middle.

[00:28:15] Yeah.

[00:28:17] I was originally, I know you were brought up.

[00:28:19] I brought up Mormon.

[00:28:20] Right.

[00:28:20] And you were brought up Catholic.

[00:28:22] Yeah.

[00:28:22] And then we kind of both met in the middle as Christians.

[00:28:25] Yeah.

[00:28:26] And became Christians going to a Christian church.

[00:28:26] I didn't even know you were Mormon until like way after we got married.

[00:28:30] Well, because I was going to a Christian church.

[00:28:32] Because you don't practice it or anything like that.

[00:28:33] Well, I hadn't gone to a Mormon church since I was 18.

[00:28:36] Yeah.

[00:28:37] But I still.

[00:28:38] And you had questions.

[00:28:38] I'm still based in religion.

[00:28:40] Yeah, yeah.

[00:28:41] Of course.

[00:28:41] So going to a Christian church felt natural to me.

[00:28:44] Right.

[00:28:45] And I had been to Christian churches before growing up.

[00:28:48] You know, I had friends that were Christians.

[00:28:50] Yeah.

[00:28:50] That were going to Christian churches and Calvary churches.

[00:28:53] Yeah.

[00:28:54] So I would go to church with them sometimes.

[00:28:56] And so it felt natural to me.

[00:28:58] And so us going together to a church like that.

[00:29:00] But what about, you know, there's sometimes when people are just not, they're refusing

[00:29:05] to cross the line.

[00:29:06] And I feel like they're going to have a problem, you know, finding common ground if they're

[00:29:12] not willing, if one person isn't willing to maybe either go to church or if one person

[00:29:19] isn't willing to find, you know, a meeting ground in the middle for a religion.

[00:29:27] I think the best thing that you can do, and I did this for you.

[00:29:32] I don't know if you know or if you don't know, but to pray for that person, just pray

[00:29:38] for them.

[00:29:38] Pray for them.

[00:29:42] Because I understand that.

[00:29:44] So important.

[00:29:45] So important.

[00:29:46] And I've seen it.

[00:29:47] I've seen the miracles that even when you're down a bad path, God doesn't just step away

[00:29:55] from you.

[00:29:56] He's still rooting for you.

[00:29:58] And he still believes in you.

[00:30:00] And he still loves you.

[00:30:02] And he's waiting for you to come home.

[00:30:04] So I would just say, pray for that person.

[00:30:08] Don't push it on them.

[00:30:09] And I did.

[00:30:10] I pulled you to church.

[00:30:12] And, and, um, but I wasn't, but it was, no, you weren't fine.

[00:30:17] No, you weren't.

[00:30:17] I love going to church.

[00:30:18] No, you weren't.

[00:30:19] But I think it was just this, okay, like you were very open.

[00:30:24] Um, and I just feel you're a lot deeper into your faith now.

[00:30:30] I think sometimes God works in funny ways where, um, something could happen.

[00:30:40] If, if you're not, if you're not, um, already pursuing him, he's going to pull some funny stuff

[00:30:48] to show you the miracles if you're not already pursuing him.

[00:30:52] And that could be some crazy diagnosis.

[00:30:55] It could be, it, it could be, you know, a lot of things we're, we're doing the,

[00:31:00] um, oh, I don't want to, I don't want to spoil it.

[00:31:05] I'll tell you guys another time.

[00:31:06] But anyway, there was a story that I was listening to the other day.

[00:31:12] I don't mean to leave you guys hanging.

[00:31:14] So I will talk about it.

[00:31:15] There was a story I was listening to the other day about a couple, um, and she was just kind

[00:31:22] of going through the motions of going to church.

[00:31:25] Um, she ended up losing her husband who was very faithful to God and in the grief and in

[00:31:38] the pain of it all, that's when she found God after he had already lost his life to this,

[00:31:46] just this, this quick moving disease that, that, uh, sometimes comes unexpectedly.

[00:31:52] And it wasn't the miracle because we know our God, our God is a God of miracles, but sometimes

[00:32:00] that's not always his plan, you know, and, and that can make you go, especially if she wasn't

[00:32:08] rooted in the church, it could make her completely go the other way, but it didn't.

[00:32:13] It made her believe because she was there with him every step of the way.

[00:32:18] And she felt, she felt God's presence when he, the way that he was just having his last,

[00:32:27] they were counting his last breaths and the way that he left, she knew for a fact that there was a

[00:32:36] God and that was the miracle in that journey.

[00:32:39] A miracle is probably, and he probably, I mean, unfortunately it had to happen that way,

[00:32:44] but his, her husband probably is standing there going, I brought her back to God.

[00:32:50] Oh yeah.

[00:32:50] And, and feeling, feeling like that was, if that was the one thing he was meant to do on

[00:32:55] this earth, then that's what he was meant to do.

[00:32:58] And that's important.

[00:33:00] And I just, I just, I just, it's so, I mean, we're all on, you know, you don't have to be an

[00:33:06] entrepreneur, you know, this podcast is for entrepreneur parents.

[00:33:09] You have to be an entrepreneur to listen to it.

[00:33:11] We're about marriages.

[00:33:13] We're about being great parents.

[00:33:14] We're about, you know, running great businesses and building companies.

[00:33:18] And all that is important.

[00:33:20] And I'm telling you, there's nothing stronger.

[00:33:22] And like, until you are deeply rooted in it and you practice it, you won't understand.

[00:33:28] But when you do it, you understand exactly what I'm speaking about.

[00:33:32] That when you're rooted in it and you're creating businesses and you're, and you have a marriage,

[00:33:38] you are just so blessed in so many areas that it's hard to explain.

[00:33:43] It just, it just happens.

[00:33:45] And you need to, I think if you're not presently today, if you're not, if you're just going through the motions.

[00:33:53] Yeah.

[00:33:54] And you're not doing it with conviction that you need to, you need to see what you can do to move in that direction.

[00:34:02] Make time for it.

[00:34:04] Because it's important.

[00:34:04] It's the most important thing.

[00:34:06] I mean, we're on this journey.

[00:34:08] Our God-given destiny is to make it to heaven.

[00:34:12] Nothing is more important than that.

[00:34:13] You can't take the, you can't take the cars.

[00:34:16] You can't take the money.

[00:34:17] You can't take whatever you collect it up.

[00:34:20] It's, it's, it's things of the earth.

[00:34:22] And I feel.

[00:34:24] You might try.

[00:34:25] Ever since having.

[00:34:26] You might try.

[00:34:26] Right.

[00:34:27] You might get buried with it, but I promise it's not coming.

[00:34:30] I just, I feel ever since I got pregnant, that was something that I couldn't, that wasn't in.

[00:34:36] I thought it wasn't in my cards and I prayed for it.

[00:34:40] And it happened.

[00:34:42] That was the miracle.

[00:34:43] And I knew from that second, as soon as I was carrying, I had to really be firm in my relationship

[00:34:52] with God.

[00:34:54] And I wanted you there with me on that journey.

[00:34:57] And it's so beautiful because our testimony, it played out different right away.

[00:35:05] Daniel's praying for a little baby sister.

[00:35:07] He had a baby sister.

[00:35:08] And then the, the unthinkable happened.

[00:35:11] The unthinkable happened.

[00:35:14] But we, even in that, that awful diagnosis and the fear, I don't, I can't say, I mean,

[00:35:24] it was scary, but we were so happy and we still, we still truly are.

[00:35:31] Of course we face things, things come up and that's always going to happen in marriage and

[00:35:36] in life.

[00:35:37] It's never going to be a smooth sailing all the way through.

[00:35:40] But I just know if I wouldn't have built that foundation before that.

[00:35:47] Yeah.

[00:35:48] I'm telling you, like you lived those miracles with me.

[00:35:53] They, we felt it together.

[00:35:54] One moment that I will never forget is standing in the kitchen with you and the day of your

[00:36:02] surgery.

[00:36:03] And you were, I remember you were so scared, your bottom lip was shaking and you were crying.

[00:36:09] And we said, we said, I mean, literally may I, may I fall down dead if this is not, if this

[00:36:17] is a lie.

[00:36:18] We said, God will show you, God will show you a sign.

[00:36:23] And literally within one second, the brightest sun, it was cloudy and the brightest sun came

[00:36:31] through the windows.

[00:36:32] I don't know.

[00:36:32] It was just bright.

[00:36:32] It was so bright that I can't even, you can't make this up.

[00:36:37] It was unbelievable.

[00:36:38] And we just looked at each other and we both just both got so emotional.

[00:36:44] Yeah.

[00:36:45] It was mind blowing.

[00:36:46] The second one I said, I wasn't going to do the surgery and it just, I don't know.

[00:36:51] Like, and it's weird because I ended up doing this surgery.

[00:36:54] God saying you're going to be okay.

[00:36:56] Either way, you're going to be okay.

[00:36:58] And I felt this peace, this crazy peace over me.

[00:37:04] And, and I can't wait to talk about my, my testimony someday about when I went into

[00:37:10] surgery and all that other stuff.

[00:37:12] You should be so scared.

[00:37:13] And I felt, I felt so much love just, and I can't, and I know that you guys in my community

[00:37:21] have experienced stuff like this, but I'm so grateful to have shared that with you because

[00:37:27] I feel like from that moment, from that moment when that happened and then seeing that our God

[00:37:35] is a healing God and a God of miracles, you can't deny it.

[00:37:41] And you were home.

[00:37:42] You were back in his arms.

[00:37:45] Guys, guys, I hope you got something from this podcast today.

[00:37:50] I hope you, we wanted to bear our testimony a little bit and talk to you about the things

[00:37:56] that have affected us and have changed our lives for the better.

[00:38:00] And that is God.

[00:38:02] That is God.

[00:38:03] Keeping God first place in our marriage has made our marriage so much stronger and has

[00:38:08] changed our lives.

[00:38:09] And I'm not, and like you said at the top of the podcast, I truly am not sure if we would

[00:38:14] be together if we didn't have God in our marriage.

[00:38:17] Yeah.

[00:38:18] So it will change your life.

[00:38:20] If you're not, if this isn't, if God isn't a part of your marriage, look into that, move

[00:38:25] in that direction.

[00:38:26] Just explore it.

[00:38:27] See what it can do for you.

[00:38:28] Just explore it.

[00:38:29] We're listening to the Advent on Hallow.

[00:38:32] And there's a lot of people that I just, I love when we do challenges on there because

[00:38:39] there's so many powerful stories about people that, that didn't believe.

[00:38:44] And I love to hear their testimonies.

[00:38:47] I love to hear their conversion stories.

[00:38:49] And, and I love to, I just, they're not always, they're not always happy stories.

[00:38:54] And, and.

[00:38:55] They're always powerful.

[00:38:56] But there is a, what is it?

[00:38:59] The, the sunshine on the other side of the rain through it.

[00:39:04] Like the, the light will always come through the darkness.

[00:39:07] So I love those stories.

[00:39:09] And as, as, I'm going to keep it a secret about what our producers said, but anyway, some

[00:39:17] really exciting stuff coming up and thank you for joining us this week.

[00:39:23] For another episode of our divorce proofing your marriage series, which is so important.

[00:39:30] Good.

[00:39:30] And, and we hope to catch you next week for episode five of that series.

[00:39:36] Yes.

[00:39:37] Or episode six of that series.

[00:39:38] Sorry.

[00:39:39] Episode six of that series.

[00:39:41] Thank you guys for joining us.

[00:39:43] And we will catch you guys next week.

[00:39:45] God bless you guys.

[00:39:46] Thank you for joining us.

[00:39:48] Thank you for listening to this great episode of the Pretty and Punk podcast.

[00:39:54] Hope it got the best of you.

[00:39:56] Bless your marriage and bless you.

[00:39:59] Have a great week.

[00:40:00] God bless.

[00:40:01] Thank you for listening.

[00:40:02] God bless you.

[00:40:04] God bless your marriage.

[00:40:06] Bye.

[00:40:07] Have a great day.

[00:40:08] We love you so much.

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