Not Everyone Who Raises Your Child Shares Your Last Name!

[00:00:03] When I tell you about the people who helped raise me, who poured into me as a child, some of them won't appear on our family tree. There was a neighbor I called my grandmother. I went over and I adopted her. And her husband became my grandfather.

[00:00:27] There were trusted men and women that my mother intentionally welcomed into our lives. Devoted fathers, mothers who were accomplished, who cared deeply for their families. A godfather, father figures, men whose example helped me see.

[00:00:56] And my brother. See how success could grow alongside faith, love and responsibility. And there was my brother David. My brother who became so much more than a brother to me. When I look back at my childhood, I remember how deeply I was loved. My mother helped make that possible.

[00:01:23] She recognized the people who had something beautiful to offer us. And she nurtured those relationships. Come in close friends. We're about to have another valuable conversation. Get comfortable. Grab the people you love. Grab your healthy snack if you haven't had a bite all day. I'm telling you, you gotta feed yourself. You gotta take care of yourself.

[00:01:52] I know. I know it's hard. I know it's hard as moms. We forget the meals. So take the time now. If this is your time, enjoy it. And if you're at the gym, crank it up. Let's go. Ooh, that's better, right babe?

[00:02:21] She founded an architectural concrete company. He founded a $100 million clothing company. She took the world by storm as a social media star. He took the world by storm as a famous serial entrepreneur. Together we started a business. And had babies. Now we're figuring out the best ways to do both. Join us as we learn from other entrepreneurs going through the same life struggles. As they share their life hacks about success, love, kids. And everything in between.

[00:02:50] Welcome back to Becoming Unshakeable brought to you by the Entrepreneur Parents Podcast, where we grow in faith, strengthen our families, and become more intentional about the legacy we're building together. I'm your host, Ildiko Ferenczi. It is such an honor to be here with you. And I'm so glad that you showed up today.

[00:03:14] Today, I want to have a conversation with you about the people who became part of our family's story and what we could learn from them. When my parents divorced and my father was no longer in our daily lives, my brother stepped into an important role. I mention this sometimes.

[00:03:42] David was someone that I looked up to. He was my father figure. Someone who helped make our home feel happy and full of love. And someone who taught me incredibly important life lessons that I'll never forget. About gratitude and hard work and all the things that built character in me at such a young age.

[00:04:07] My mother was thoughtful about who she surrounded us with. She was so thoughtful. She valued men and women who were good examples of faith, family, and responsibility. Among them were our mayor, accomplished local doctors and attorneys, artists.

[00:04:36] I remember one of those artists, one of the artists, the female artists, she showed me how to paint a strawberry. And I came up with this idea to paint strawberries on children's faces during a festival. And I made my first big bucks on my very own business. That was besides helping my mom in the store.

[00:04:59] And many different entrepreneurs that she would surround us with that would be in our environment. Through their lives, she wanted us to see what was possible. To build something meaningful and contribute to the world around us. What mattered most to her was their character. How they cared for their families.

[00:05:26] Honored their spouses, their commitments, and used their gifts to serve. To serve others. And I had people I could watch. Mothers and fathers who built together. Who raised successful families. Who had strong marriages.

[00:05:51] Whose lives helped me understand what care and commitment looked like. Keeping your word. Becoming a person of integrity. Building something successful. And still keeping a beautiful family intact. And our neighbors became grandparents to me.

[00:06:20] So many great relationships that my brother and I were exposed to. Those relationships mattered. I still carry them. I've been thinking about this as Daniel and Destiny are growing since they were babies. There are trusted men and women in their lives who they affectionately call uncle and auntie. The other day we mentioned one of them.

[00:06:50] They have several beautiful people in their family. But we were talking about one the other day. When he invited Daniel to speak on his stage. It meant something beyond the stage itself. Someone Daniel loves and admires had thought of him.

[00:07:14] There's something beautiful about a child knowing that people outside their immediate household are interested in who they're becoming. And for us as parents, it's worth looking closely at those relationships. Who takes a sincere interest in our children?

[00:07:38] Sometimes it's surprising how deeply people care for our children. Who want to see them succeed. Who pour into them. Who help them. Who helped me as a child. Who treats our people we love with kindness when there's nothing to gain. Who respects the way we're raising them.

[00:08:07] And lets us know those everyday things help us decide which relationships to nurture. We can invite a trusted family friend to go on a vacation with us. To go out for dinner. Spend some time with a godparent.

[00:08:35] A grandparent figure. Right? An uncle and aunt. Let our children see a good person. Keep a promise. Admit a mistake. And help someone quietly. Watching them build their lives. Their marriages pour into it. The businesses that they build. To watch that. To witness that.

[00:09:06] There's so much they learn through ordinary life together. Together. My mother also gave me. This is where I learned it from. She gave me another way to learn from people. This is an interesting one. I've shared this a couple times. I think. I think I have. Maybe I just. I was talking about it in my community. But I'm pretty sure I brought it to the podcast.

[00:09:35] She encouraged me to read. She helped me imagine the people whose books I read as an army behind me. People sharing their experience. Giving me advice I could carry into my own life. That made me want to read more. Or an author might never know how much their words meant to me.

[00:10:02] But I could return to a page when I needed perspective. Or let's be honest. Courage. Sometimes I needed courage. I could return to that page. I could return to that book. That's different from a person who knows us. And could sit beside us. Because she also had those relationships for us.

[00:10:30] Both have been valuable in my life. And I want my children to understand that they can seek wisdom. Learn from someone's experience. And think carefully about what they're learning. There is a whole world of knowledge beyond what I could teach them myself. That's why I always have podcasts on. I remember when Daniel was... Oh gosh. Was he two?

[00:10:59] Three? Two or three. And he was excited about Jay Shetty. And he would share the quotes. And Jay Shetty sent him a signed book. Earlier than that, Gary Vaynerchuk sent him a signed book. There were so many people he looked up to. Ed Milet. So many people. Eric.

[00:11:31] And even before he met them in person, he hasn't met Jay Shetty. To be honest and transparent, he hasn't met Jay Shetty. But the other ones, he has met. He's spoken on a stage with Eric, with Ed. Met Gary. And many others. But they were all part of his army before he could read.

[00:12:00] For me, it was through books. And they listen to audio books. Right? We're so lucky. Our babies, our children, they get to listen to what we listen to. I know there's many children out there that listen with their parents to our podcast. Not just my children's podcast, but to this one. And I'm so grateful to be in their lives. I'm truly grateful.

[00:12:30] So my children look at that as blessings. Even to the people that they haven't met yet. They're all soldiers behind them. Through the books, through the audio books. Through the podcasts. That's family. They may not even know their family. But children are so loving. They have this innocent love.

[00:12:57] And they gravitate towards people that resonate with them. That help them see their dreams. Their God-given calling. Futures. Now, I want to take you to a Bible moment. The book of Proverbs, chapter 13, verse 20 says, He that walketh with wise men shall be wise. But a companion of fools shall be destroyed.

[00:13:28] The people we spend time with matter. As parents, we can be thoughtful about those examples our children see close up. We can look for wisdom in the way someone lives. How they speak. How they handle responsibility. And how they treat the people who depend on them. And sometimes, friends.

[00:13:56] Sometimes, sometimes it's not in our immediate bloodline. Sometimes it's the family that we create. I was talking about this the other day when we were in religious class. And it resonated deeply with not only myself, but especially my children. Which is many of the people that we will call family in our life are not in our family tree. The people that pour into us.

[00:14:24] The ones that push us up on the ladder. The ones that love us. Help us. They may not necessarily be in our family tree. Direct bloodline. I thought that was so beautiful. And it resonated. Friends, grab your journals and something to write with.

[00:14:50] If you have a moment, write down the name of someone who helped shape your life. You may not think, you may not even realize it. You may have to sit down and like Destiny says, rewind the time. Go back in the time machine. Think of someone who helped shape your life. Maybe it was a person at the corner store.

[00:15:17] Maybe it was a teacher that said something to you. A coach. A godfather, godmother. A family friend. Maybe you were a child of divorce. But there was another father figure that was so powerful in your life. What did you learn from them? Then, and consider your child's world.

[00:15:46] Is there a trusted relationship you would like to make more room for? Or someone whose wisdom you could introduce through a book that you read together? A podcast. Or an audio book. This week. I invite you to take part in this legacy challenge.

[00:16:17] Nurture one meaningful connection. Arrange time together. Or tell someone specifically how their example has helped your family. A family friend. Someone in your neighborhood. Let your children hear you express that gratitude. I think that's something easy that we could take part in today. Or sometime this week.

[00:16:47] I'm grateful my mother recognized how much other people could bring into our lives. To make it so full and filled with a love and care. We had such a great childhood. Their love and wisdom became part of my childhood. Part of my story.

[00:17:07] And now I get to be thoughtful about the people and experiences that become part of my children's life. Now on that thought, let's come together in prayer. Two or more remember. When two or more come together in prayer. Heavenly Father. Heavenly Father. Heavenly Father.

[00:17:36] God, thank you for the people who have cared for us. And helped us grow. Give us discernment as we nurture relationships around our children. Help us recognize wisdom. Welcome sincere love. And become a faithful presence in someone else's life too. Help us to pour into others.

[00:18:06] Into other children that need it. Help our children pour into other children that need it. Become great, great, great individuals to lean into for others. Other children out there. Help us to surround our families with love. And to help pour into their God-given destinies. And we say this in Jesus' name. Amen.

[00:18:34] Friends, thank you for being here. Perhaps someone came to mind today. A neighbor, a teacher, a family friend who gave you more than they realized. Tell them if you can. It's a beautiful thing to let someone know what they have done for you, for your children. And how they're making a difference in your life. And friends, follow the Entrepreneur Parents podcast.

[00:19:03] So you never miss an episode. Share this conversation. And leave five golden stars. I love to say that. Daniel and Destiny say that all the time. And it sticks. And leave a kind review if this encouraged you. These things only take a few seconds. But it truly helps become a blessing for someone else that needs these conversations. And for screen-free learning, we need that. We need that. We need that as families.

[00:19:33] For something to play in the background while we're cooking or playing with our children or coloring. This podcast really plants seeds of greatness in tomorrow's leaders. Join Destiny and Daniel on the Entrepreneur Kids Legacy Show. They work hard to show up twice a week.

[00:19:57] And if you'd like to help produce those shows, you can do that at buymeacoffee.com backslash entrepreneurkids. And if you want to buy me a coffee, I am grateful for that. Thank you so much. Please leave me a message or reach out. All the links are below. You can leave me a message so I can get to know you. And I want to hear what you're building. I want to hear what you're building with your family.

[00:20:26] The legacy that you're leaving. And until next time, protect what matters. Keep building your family's legacy. And remember, the people in front of you, they're part of your God-given destiny. God bless you. We love you. Glory to God always. And remember, remember those links, they're at the bottom. Come introduce yourself.

[00:20:52] And if you have great content, I know so many of you are growing your pages or growing your businesses. And it is such an honor to share the content that you've worked hard to create, especially moms that are second-guessing themselves. And their fingers are shaking because they're nervous. They don't want to do that first post. And they do it anyway.

[00:21:16] I want to help put the message out there, the content that you created, the business that you're building, the message that you have. Please share it with me so I can share it. That's what I'm here for. God bless you. I love you. And I can't wait to talk to you soon. Today's it.

[00:21:47] And care about. Oh, and we'd love to personally invite you to listen to our podcast. It's for young future leaders ready to change the world and be a light in the dark. Listen together as a family. It's called.

[00:22:32] Because every legacy begins with a hero. And that hero is young. This podcast is for inspirational and educational purposes only. And it is not intended to replace professional advice, legal advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The views expressed are based on personal experience and faith-based insight and are meant to encourage reflection and growth.

[00:23:02] Always seek the guidance of qualified professionals regarding any questions or concerns you may have about your health, relationships, or business.