Critical Fact: The Health of Your Marriage Can Lead to Success or Bankruptcy in Business.

[00:00:00] That was truly cracking at the foundation of what we had discussed for several years

[00:00:06] to have this freedom and I saw our children suffering from that and also truly growing away

[00:00:16] from their father.

[00:00:17] Uh, no.

[00:00:24] Oh, that's better right, babe?

[00:00:28] Yeah!

[00:00:29] Yeah.

[00:00:33] She founded an architectural concrete company.

[00:00:35] He founded a hundred million dollar clothing company.

[00:00:39] She took the world by storm as a social media star.

[00:00:42] He took the world by storm as a famous serial entrepreneur.

[00:00:45] Together we started a business and had babies.

[00:00:48] Now we're figuring out the best ways to do both.

[00:00:51] Join us as we learn from other entrepreneurs going through the same life struggles.

[00:00:56] As they share their life packs about success, love, kids and everything in between.

[00:01:02] Mero is meant to be a journey together.

[00:01:05] An adventure will love its own map, trust its own compass and our shared dreams of a destiny.

[00:01:13] Mero is good, everything is good.

[00:01:21] Welcome to the PritingPunk podcast.

[00:01:22] My name is Dan Caldwell and I'm here with my beautiful wife and partner and host.

[00:01:31] You the CoFerency.

[00:01:33] And we have another great podcast for you guys today and we were just asking the question,

[00:01:39] is marriage the foundation to a successful business?

[00:01:43] And what we mean by that really is, what do we mean by that exactly?

[00:01:48] Well, if things are running right at home, it's going to reflect on your business.

[00:01:54] If things are breaking at a breaking point where you really need to invest in your marriage

[00:02:00] at that time, I just feel things are, I mean from our personal experience and from the

[00:02:07] people that we surround ourselves with, their business starts to struggle.

[00:02:11] It may not struggle right away but eventually the wheels can even fall off.

[00:02:16] I mean you're 100% right when we know from personal experience unfortunately that when

[00:02:24] our relationship is a little rocky and we're at each other's throats a little bit and

[00:02:31] we're trying to and I go walking out the door like, okay whatever we'll talk later.

[00:02:37] And I get to the office, I'm not in the right frame of mind to be doing the things that

[00:02:42] I need to be doing.

[00:02:44] And now, you know, and that was a while ago but I say now it's, you know, we're on this

[00:02:50] journey together and it's great when you have a business together and even when you don't

[00:02:56] I truly believe that you and your spouse are on this journey together.

[00:03:02] You're on a journey together, you have dreams together, you're building something together

[00:03:08] and that's not only a family where you have kids and you're trying to build them up

[00:03:14] and you're growing, you know, tomorrow's future leaders but you're also it's important

[00:03:23] to have these dreams together about what you're building.

[00:03:26] Yeah, it has to be together because if you're not on the same page how are you fighting

[00:03:33] and risking at all for that same vision, that same, you know, I think you need to discuss

[00:03:40] those goals every two, have your two-year goal, your five-year goal, your ten-year goal,

[00:03:45] your 15 and your 20 write them all down and make sure that they're all parallel because

[00:03:52] if you have say for example one of you have the vision of freedom to get up and go

[00:04:00] and you're not there, that may be a ten-year goal and you guys aren't working towards that.

[00:04:06] If that makes sense to you, for example, if you have your office job and that's what was

[00:04:11] happening to us last year is that he had this office job that I thought he was going

[00:04:17] to be consulting.

[00:04:18] That's what I truly believed in my heart but nobody told me he'd be there from like five

[00:04:24] six a.m. to 10 p.m. at night, it was just, it was just a gong show and that was truly cracking

[00:04:33] at the foundation of what we had discussed for several years to have this, this freedom

[00:04:39] and I saw our children suffering from, from that and also truly growing away from their

[00:04:47] father because he wasn't able to put that, just have the communication.

[00:04:54] We were leaving emotional connection.

[00:04:57] They were sleeping in the morning when he left and they were sleeping at night when he

[00:05:00] got home so how are you supposed to connect?

[00:05:04] Anyway, I hope nobody's going through that because it was really hard but I'm grateful

[00:05:10] that we're able to share.

[00:05:12] Well unfortunately there's other entrepreneurs going through that right now for sure.

[00:05:16] Because I've gone through several times, it's not the first time I've gone through that

[00:05:21] but that's where they've gone through it several times.

[00:05:24] But before we get too far into it.

[00:05:25] Oh gosh.

[00:05:26] Hey guys, we hope you're enjoying today's episode of the Pretty and Punk podcast and if

[00:05:31] you are and you haven't already hit that like and subscribe button, it just takes a second

[00:05:36] and means so much to us because it really helps the podcast get out there to more listeners

[00:05:40] like you guys and if you know anybody it might help and you can send it to them, we really

[00:05:45] appreciate that too.

[00:05:47] We also love and appreciate your reviews.

[00:05:50] Even the babies look forward to them every day.

[00:05:52] If you share this episode on social media today, don't forget to tag us.

[00:05:57] We want to celebrate you because we know it's not easy being a parent in business and

[00:06:02] the way that you juggle things makes you a superhero.

[00:06:05] That's worth a shout out.

[00:06:06] Together we have a community of our personal followers as well and we just want to put

[00:06:11] it out there.

[00:06:12] We want to show everybody that this juggle is possible and you are our family and we're

[00:06:19] so proud and grateful to have you a part of this family.

[00:06:24] So don't forget all the links are below in the show notes and thank you again and let's

[00:06:31] get back to the show.

[00:06:33] Is marriage the foundation to a successful business?

[00:06:38] I really wanted to finish that thought and I was talking a little bit about it last week

[00:06:42] and sometimes it's hard for me to put things in towards with the mommy brain.

[00:06:47] But what is important is that yes, we've gone through that struggle and I don't ever want

[00:06:54] to pray for God to just take it away and make it easy because I'm understanding more

[00:07:01] and more that the struggles of maybe loss or struggles in relationships or business struggles

[00:07:09] or these things that we overcome, there are only a few of us that are chosen to go through

[00:07:15] these hard times and that's because God knows how strong we truly are.

[00:07:21] And when you have that strength as an individual or as a couple and we get to share those

[00:07:28] things with you guys and hopefully you're not going through it.

[00:07:31] But if you are don't take it as oh my gosh, just take it away.

[00:07:37] Really sit in that and learn and study the journey of how because you will get out of

[00:07:42] it.

[00:07:43] Everything passes.

[00:07:45] The sun must shine after the rain.

[00:07:47] So take the notes on how you got out of this situation and take it as a blessing because

[00:07:54] you are someone that other people in your community, in your surroundings and your family

[00:07:58] can truly look up to you as you share this.

[00:08:01] So I have no shame or embarrassment sharing our struggles or our rocky road little bits

[00:08:09] because it's I know.

[00:08:12] I know there's a confirmation from emails and messages that it's a blessing to someone

[00:08:17] and it gives them the confidence to share their journey with someone else that may need

[00:08:23] it.

[00:08:24] Yeah, I mean business is like marriage, business is hard.

[00:08:28] Yes it is.

[00:08:29] And marriage is hard.

[00:08:30] And just so you know, side note, if you're having hardships in your marriage right now

[00:08:38] no, it's not supposed to be easy.

[00:08:40] That's just how it is.

[00:08:41] Marriage is not supposed to be easy.

[00:08:42] That's where I stumble.

[00:08:43] Just like business is not supposed to be easy.

[00:08:45] That's where I stumble.

[00:08:46] I have to accept that.

[00:08:47] Right.

[00:08:48] Just like when you go into a new business, you have to know that you're going to have struggles.

[00:08:53] You're going to have hardships because if it becomes some big surprise to you, you might

[00:08:59] try to dive out and I think too many people do that in their marriages.

[00:09:03] Well, because I know that this is a thing, okay?

[00:09:07] You're supposed to, if it doesn't feel good, it doesn't feel right, it doesn't feel easy,

[00:09:13] and I think it's time for us to get a divorce or it's time for us to put this business to

[00:09:19] rest.

[00:09:20] Obviously, sometimes you will know the signs because you're going to have mentors around

[00:09:24] you, you can reach out to people like us or there's business coaches and you could really

[00:09:30] dissect your business and find out is it right?

[00:09:33] Is it wrong?

[00:09:34] What can I do better?

[00:09:35] But with the relationship aspect of marriage, it isn't easy and there's different things

[00:09:41] that are going to come into everybody has different struggles, but that's not something

[00:09:46] that you can't work through.

[00:09:48] I always felt like, oh no, if you lose that feeling, then it's over and maybe I've pulled

[00:09:58] the plug on relationships, not knowing that.

[00:10:01] I feel a lot of people don't know that, right?

[00:10:06] They just go with the feeling and then it doesn't always feel good.

[00:10:11] It's work and when you get into the biblical meaning of marriage and the relationship,

[00:10:16] it's the commitment to the relationship.

[00:10:21] It's not all, of course that first and foremost, but that's the commitment to your marriage,

[00:10:28] to your relationship, to your spouse and that's where the feeling is going to come in after.

[00:10:36] It's definitely hard work.

[00:10:38] Let's talk about the flip side.

[00:10:39] The flip side of that is you guys in a business and marriage, and what we mean by the marriage

[00:10:48] being the foundation is also the support system.

[00:10:53] Your marriage is your support system or it should be for your business and guys, we

[00:10:57] get too good at bottling things up because we need to feel like we can't talk to anybody.

[00:11:05] Well, your spouse is the one person that you should be able to talk to.

[00:11:09] I know when hardships come on, I'm not bringing this up to my wife because I don't want

[00:11:17] her to worry about this situation or that situation.

[00:11:20] It's needless because I'm going to fix it.

[00:11:22] That's my mindset.

[00:11:24] I know we struggle and we carry that burden sometimes.

[00:11:29] That photo where this guy has been over and he's just got all these swords in his back

[00:11:35] because he's willing to take all the swords.

[00:11:37] It's so true about us men that we're willing to take this on and we bottle it up instead

[00:11:43] of having this open communication with our wives where we, I'm telling you women have

[00:11:49] some sort of intuition or they have something they were blessed with that God gave to them

[00:11:55] that us men do not have as much of and when we can have those conversations with them,

[00:12:02] sometimes they see things that we don't see.

[00:12:06] We can't talk to normal people about this because we maybe don't need other people knowing

[00:12:12] our business in our business.

[00:12:14] They don't need to know that we are struggling with finances that cash flow is horrible

[00:12:23] and that the money coming in from this loan didn't show up.

[00:12:28] Other people don't need to know that but your wife, you can have these conversations

[00:12:32] with her to help get this stuff off of your back a little bit and have this open conversation.

[00:12:38] I feel like it's an honest conversation.

[00:12:40] I know it's an honest conversation.

[00:12:41] It affects both of you.

[00:12:43] Right.

[00:12:44] All of our successful friends that have incredibly successful businesses, they say the same

[00:12:50] thing, my wife, I tell her everything and she guides me in the right direction because

[00:12:56] she has this intuition.

[00:12:58] I don't know if it's because and I feel really once you become a mother there's the

[00:13:05] woman's intuition but once you become a mother it's like this whole different spotty sense

[00:13:12] and you just know even a business partner or people that are surrounding you, you just

[00:13:18] know I have to protect the family from this but also you get these really good ideas

[00:13:24] that just open the gates to business blowing up and it maybe create, maybe she's blessed

[00:13:32] with creativity whatever else.

[00:13:36] Which most of the time women are.

[00:13:38] Right and as in business if you don't communicate properly in business it's going to fail so

[00:13:45] you need to bring that communication, that skill that you use in your business.

[00:13:52] I'm saying if your wife isn't a business partner share with her anyway.

[00:13:56] I would actually bet David Patrick.

[00:13:59] Yeah he was talking about this the other day too that he shares and gets great ideas from

[00:14:05] his wife and she has the spotty senses too.

[00:14:08] He didn't call us by these words.

[00:14:09] And his wife is a part of his business and she has an offset but it doesn't need to be

[00:14:14] that.

[00:14:15] Men we so often think that our women, that our wives have to be like if they're not business

[00:14:21] partners like involved in our business every day that they had that unless they have

[00:14:25] that position that we don't discuss.

[00:14:28] We don't discuss the business at all but I think and regardless women out there if you're

[00:14:33] listening you need to like be thinking about that you guys are on this journey together

[00:14:40] whether you want to be or not you guys are going the same direction and if you're not going

[00:14:43] the same direction you're having a lot of problems.

[00:14:46] But if you're going, you should be going the same direction and wives if you contribute

[00:14:51] to these conversations that you know because sometimes your husband needs to unload what's

[00:14:56] sitting on you know what he's been carrying this load that he's been carrying he needs to

[00:15:00] unload it on somebody and having these conversations with you help relieve him of some

[00:15:05] of this stress especially if you know you're not like oh my gosh what are we gonna do if

[00:15:10] that happens and what and what you know we're gonna lose our house or you know it's

[00:15:14] like you got to have these positive conversations where you guys are both on the same page

[00:15:19] and you guys are both lifting each other up and it's important and if you guys are doing

[00:15:24] this and this is what we try to do all the time is have these conversations and not to

[00:15:30] say that one of us don't get down you know sometimes but if you have these conversations

[00:15:37] you guys are constantly lifting each other up and giving each other energy, giving each

[00:15:41] other energy to help move yourself forward and help lift that business up and your marriage.

[00:15:48] And it gives her the safety to be able to open up about the things that are bothering

[00:15:53] her actually there was a couple that was just they shared their story there was an entrepreneur

[00:16:00] and he lost everything everything and he said now I have to go home and tell my wife

[00:16:07] and she came from a hard a hard background where she was adopted and she really didn't

[00:16:13] have anything in her life growing up so they built this success together and he sat

[00:16:19] her down and he said I lost everything I lost everything and she said I thought I was

[00:16:27] your everything he goes yeah but I mean like everything and he had this weight of telling

[00:16:34] her that everything that he's worked for it's gone the life that they had together

[00:16:41] it's gone and she said that's okay I've been poor before and we can build it up again.

[00:16:48] So he said that that took a tremendous weight off his shoulders and also gave him empowered

[00:16:55] him with the strength to do it all over again and now he's successful.

[00:16:59] I love the story of I'm you know one of my favorite movies the greatest showman where that

[00:17:05] is kind of so much a part of why his success was his success is because he had that support

[00:17:12] of his wife right and and you can see and there's there's a perfect example and I'm sure

[00:17:17] you guys have seen the movie if you haven't absolutely go see the greatest showman it's

[00:17:21] like one of my favorite films it's it shows you in that film that she's not working

[00:17:29] in his business every day she's not there every single day doing but although she did

[00:17:33] help here and there but but she was so much a part of the foundation of who he was and

[00:17:40] what gave him the strength to build his business at least in the film and it's what we all

[00:17:47] need in our marriages and in our business to to create success I'm not saying you can't

[00:17:53] create success and if you don't have that perfect environment I'm saying people have

[00:17:58] done it but if you want it to be fluid if you want it to be great if you want to enjoy

[00:18:07] the process man when you guys are in that zen situation right it's just so much better

[00:18:14] and and that even covers our part or step two which is collaboration just like in business

[00:18:22] you collaborate with people to build things and get things seen and make them stronger

[00:18:28] you have to have that collaboration in marriage and exactly what we're talking about leaning

[00:18:33] into each other by combining your strength and working towards common objectives that's

[00:18:41] how you achieve great things first both personally and professionally yeah and I think

[00:18:48] that brings us a lot to and there's an overlap their communication which is important

[00:18:54] in we already did communications did we do communication that was the whole first half

[00:19:00] well can we jump on it again okay maybe we did we not I just felt like we I just felt

[00:19:08] like there were some parts missing I mean there was you know because there's I think

[00:19:11] communication is so important not only communicating your dreams together and I know we talked

[00:19:17] about that a little bit but communication with which I was horrible at when we met absolutely

[00:19:24] because I kept everything to myself and guys again we're back we're not get it this because

[00:19:29] we want to internalize everything and we kind of believe that other people can read our

[00:19:35] minds but just I think women are the same that way they well there's those other moments

[00:19:45] where you repeat and you repeat and you repeat what you need but it's almost like you time

[00:19:51] like men are they just don't want to hear it anymore so they don't hear it anymore

[00:19:55] and then she goes silent that that's a red flag yeah and that happens both ways exactly

[00:20:01] but I mean communication in the way that maybe I didn't clear that up but communication in

[00:20:07] the way that if you're just communicating with your wife about what's going on in your business

[00:20:13] day and you know speaking about you know being I'm coming home late today or I'm having this

[00:20:22] conversation about I'm gonna have to you know I'm thinking that at some point I'm gonna have

[00:20:28] to go I'm gonna be flying out of town for a meeting having this conversation.

[00:20:34] Give them advanced notice don't just throw it on them because women's minds are thinking days ahead

[00:20:40] so if you tell them that very day I'm leaving tomorrow she doesn't have bread she just got

[00:20:47] she's been working all day whether you call it work or not they consider if she's a stay-at-home mom

[00:20:54] that she's she works more than someone that works in the office so her wheels are turning

[00:21:00] she who's how are we how are we gonna get the bread because she whatever whatever it is just

[00:21:08] give her some advanced notice it will make her feel respected and that way she can support you

[00:21:16] on your journey rather than be angry or frustrated or just I can't believe we did this again

[00:21:23] you don't need that kind of energy at all whatever it is just give her some adequate notice also

[00:21:30] yes of course if you're gonna be late for for dinner just give her a call and let her know in

[00:21:38] advance so she stops warming up the plate because that's hurtful and frustrating and then when

[00:21:46] you walk through the door she can greet you rather than be upset and then the last thing I'll say

[00:21:51] about communication man if you're going through something women whoever's running the business

[00:21:55] that because we're in today's world where many of these businesses are being run by women

[00:22:00] if it's the other way around if you're going through something tell your spouse about that

[00:22:07] because sometimes you're not gonna show up the way you you should and because you're going

[00:22:13] through something and yeah and you're dealing with those things and so you need them to know

[00:22:20] listen I'm not in a good place right now I'm trying to deal with this problem this is the problem

[00:22:25] going through at the office right now and I'm not sure what to do and I'm sorry if I'm gonna be

[00:22:31] for the next few days I'm probably gonna be out of whack a little bit and please just bear with me

[00:22:37] you know give me some give me some rope here because I'm really struggling right now and

[00:22:44] and your spouse hopefully they can step up a little bit and and help support you in those times

[00:22:51] when you're going through that and you guys if you guys are working together obviously you're supporting

[00:22:55] each other is there something else that you think is super important well the continual investment I

[00:23:01] think when you have a business you're continuously investing in your business and whatever

[00:23:09] that may be for the growth and success of your business all the same is really important in your

[00:23:15] marriage don't stop the date nights and listen I know because I've been there when I had little ones

[00:23:23] or I have little ones um you can still have date night at home and this isn't too much to do with

[00:23:30] business but it keeps a happy environment in your home you can set up date night at home with the

[00:23:36] little one in the basket by the side or you could put them on a fun little movie in a different room

[00:23:41] but just having that moment to invest in each other and just have a conversation especially if you

[00:23:48] are business partners to have a conversation that's not about business or to have a conversation

[00:23:53] that is about business whatever you feel is the best for your family for your relationship

[00:24:02] you light the candles dim the lights change the atmosphere because not all of us have a community

[00:24:08] lean into we may not have that babysitter that we trust or um our parents many of us have elderly

[00:24:15] parents that no longer have the ability to look after our children so we have all of that strain

[00:24:24] all of that um on our backs we don't all have the freedom thank god there's a lot of couples that

[00:24:30] have people to lean into but some of us don't so just create some kind of different environment and

[00:24:37] there's uh we should put a cheat sheet up one of the weeks here we'll put a cheat sheet up of

[00:24:43] the hundred and fifty different date night ideas to do at home um I'll make sure I

[00:24:48] 100 and 50 does that have to be 150 yeah it is okay okay so I really believe in I hope

[00:24:56] that's just one way to invest there's there's other ways of course that marriage is the foundation

[00:25:02] of having a successful business it's really really hard to have a successful

[00:25:07] business and company and uh endeavor and dream come true when you're struggling at home

[00:25:15] and if things are running at home it just like when your marriage is good everything is good

[00:25:20] when your marriage is bad everything is bad and I can't explain that in too many ways other than

[00:25:25] that you that you can't get it because that's pretty it's pretty simple and it's pretty easy to

[00:25:31] understand that when your marriage is good everything is good so thank you guys for listening to

[00:25:38] this week's episode of the PritingPunk podcast and uh god bless and we'll catch you guys next week

[00:25:44] god bless thank you so much for joining us this week it's always such a pleasure and honor to

[00:25:49] speak with you guys take care if this is your first time listening to the PritingPunk podcast

[00:25:56] make sure to leave a like and if you want to see more of our videos click the subscribe button below

[00:26:03] oh and god bless you're next week please see you this amazing to the PritingPunk podcast god bless

[00:26:13] see you next time

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